Sorry I have no other ways to express my grievance that I am facing in my part time job. And below are the "lessons" I got from the issue raised.

It is not about sad or anything. It’s about disappointment and also MORE disappointment.

I understands that if someone is jealous on you they’ll stab you from behind but not in front. And I truly understands why she is so jealous. It is definitely because I am better than her. However, jealousy is not I desire to get in order to prove that I am good. I just want a peaceful life and being friendly to all the people around me so that I can bring happiness to all the people including my so called enemies.

I used to get through all that and I know that it is not a pleasant thing to hate or being jealous to other people. I learnt to be kind, I learnt to put down unpleasant things, I learnt to give up, I learnt to give away, I learnt to be nice, I learnt to respect people, I learnt to make friends, I learnt to the one that breaks the ice, I learnt to communicate, I learnt to be brave so that I won’t get hurt, I learnt to protect myself. I got complains, insult, hatred, jealousy, scolded, ignored, rejected and the list goes on. But I am still standing there, facing the music and never run away.

You know why? Because I truly believes that to settle the problems, we shall not run away from the reality. It is really stupid to do so because you’ll never get the answer you wanted and you feel regret for that. You may say that the answer is not important. Well, that is your problem. But, what is the point of being a coward? Be brave for once and for all, get through the darkest path in your life and your life will be a lot more easier in the future. Not to say you will not face the same thing but you will be stronger and more calm and know how to handle it even when the worst situation happens.

I used to be a coward. End up, I am being bullied, mentally and physically, mainly mentally of course. (Probably because I cares.) However, I am consider lucky to have a bunch of true friends around me and they do not give up on me no matter what happened. They support me even when I’m in the deepest hole that I ever had, they encourage me when I am down and angry, they make me happy when I am weak. Thanks to them that leads me a better life somehow.

I think I am special, in the sense that I can really feel or know what other people’s feeling. I can tell when someone meets problem and needs help, I will automatically help them when they really need help without them asking for it because I can feel the pain. I couldn’t bear to see them in vain while I am standing right in front of them. I can understand them so well because somehow I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me applied to them again. History made a better tomorrow, that's what I believes. I don’t want to see people suffer because of the "unnecessary" situation. I hope they can be as strong as me. I hope they can continue live happily in their own ways.

But, sadly, no one really do understands me entirely.

I am looking for least a friend that can understands me but I haven't found one. I don’t blame them for that. It’s just a little disappointment. I just have the desire for it but not compulsory for me to get it because I know that sometimes things just can’t go as you wish. We meet obstacles and falls all the time, we just have to find ways to settle it efficiently and of course, use your own ways that really works on you.

Stay strong, do anything that you needed to relieve or express your dissatisfaction and stresses that you meet in life. Some suggestions, maybe you would like to sing karaoke, listen to music, play music, drawings, watch some comedy, pillow talks with buddies, cry out, walks alone, read some books, Skype or use any other social apps to express it to a total stranger if you does not want your people around you to know your weakest moments, sleep, eat, breathe, play with kids, and of course write blogs like me! J

Whatever you do, you shall not give up on yourself. You know they don’t worth your life.

Be strong enough to let go, and patient enough to wait what you deserve. 

Cheers! <3